These Pancakes Are Made With The Devil's Bisquick

from by The Dagg Nabbit Stubbs

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Once upon a time not long ago
Me and Tigris went out on his boat
Stalkin’ a legendary bass that the locals call “the old general”


So there we were on a private part of the lake
In a dark tangle of fallen trees
Munchin’ on a Dorito sandwich
On a hunt for that mythical beast


The one with a devilish glint in his eye and three kills to his name
They even say that big mouthed bastard burned down Lou’s Bait N’ Tackle back in ‘92
(they say)


All a sudden my line goes tight
And my pole was near bent in half
I knew it had to be the Ol’ General
Calling me out for a street fight


The son-a-bitch must weighed a hundred pounds
And been around before the lake had been found
He was tougher than any Bass
But I’d snagged a fat hook in his ass yeah it’s true
(oh yeah)


Yeah! I’m gonna rip I’m gonna pull that line!
Yeah! I’m gonna get I’m gonna take what’s mine!
You better give it everything you’ve got, Sir!
Cuz I’m gunnin’ for you and I’m raining fire!


I fought the General till the sun went down
My arms hurt and there was sweat on my brow
But I knew that moment had come
And the General was finally done


The son-a-bitch must weighed a hundred pounds
And been around before the lake had been found
He was tougher than any Bass
But I’d snagged a fat hook in his ass yeah it’s true


So if you’re ever round a certain lake
There’s a record there you’ll never break
And a picture of a handsome man
With a Dorito sandwich in hand


Once upon a time not long ago
Me and Tigris went out on his boat
We caught a legendary bass and
Went to Motel 6 for the continental breakfast.

credits

from Hot Garbage, released January 3, 2009

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